My child is constantly on the Internet and doesn’t want anything else. What to do? Parents and their teenage children

At 11-12 years of age, a grown-up person enters puberty. What does this mean? The time of puberty begins, which occurs differently in different children, but, in general, has its own characteristic features. This is the beginning of intense rebellious development, when subtle changes begin in the child’s body. In just 3-4 years, he will turn into a fully formed adult, representing not only a part of society, but also an individual.

Boys and girls at this age develop unevenly, both physically and psychologically. Girls grow much faster, they show the first signs of breast and waist development. Boys seem to be delayed in development, although they also show signs of maturation - the larynx enlarges, the voice begins to modulate (by about an octave) and it is completely impossible to guess what the voice will become in just a couple or three years. Many children are not psychologically prepared for rapid changes; they may have doubts about their own attractiveness, which will increase as the changes occur, but will disappear after their complete “transformation” into an adult.

Right now, parents must support their children, prepare them for the future development of the body.
Girls experience the typical growth spurt of adolescence earlier, so they become much taller than boys their same age. Body growth occurs unevenly - arms and legs lengthen, then the torso grows. For a while, the child may seem lanky, angular and awkward. The body is still accumulating strength for accelerated sexual development.

Features of child development at 11 years old

In an 11-year-old child, everything seems new - self-awareness of the individual, stubbornness, exaltation of his shortcomings, opposition to his parents. Behavior may deteriorate sharply; the child tries hard to prove his right to independence. This period is dangerous due to the loss of contact, which will be very difficult to regain later. It is important for parents to understand that their baby has really grown up and no longer needs such strict control and care.

But if you leave the upbringing of a child to chance, considering him too old, you can get the opposite problem - denial of authority, narcissism, selfishness. Those parents who recognize this can maintain a trusting relationship with the teenager, which means that in the future they can help them with advice, protect them from big troubles. It is interesting that at the age of 11, grown-up girls demonstrate their disdain for boys - their peers begin to stare at older boys.

Nutrition for a child aged 11 years

A growing body requires high-quality nutrition. A child's appetite can be fickle, so it is important that the food is varied, tasty, and beautifully prepared. Always serve it at the table and do not allow your child to eat in front of the TV or computer. Be sure to organize hot breakfasts of boiled food - this could be porridge. Cottage cheese casserole, meat or egg dish. A nutritious breakfast does not have to be rich. Porridge with fruits or berries, omelet, sweet cottage cheese - one dish is enough.

Weak children definitely need increased protein nutrition - meat, fish, eggs. For lunch there must be a first liquid dish, salad. Drink compote, juice, cocoa, weak tea. In winter, it is good to use sauerkraut and a vinaigrette of boiled vegetables in your diet. At any time of the year, it is better to season salads with vegetable oil or sour cream, and reduce the amount of mayonnaise to a minimum.

Recently, due to poor nutrition and metabolic disorders, the number of overweight children has increased. In these cases, it is necessary to reduce the amount of fat in products - do not put a thick layer of butter on bread, meat is trimmed of fat and boiled or stewed, but not fried, milk and sour cream are consumed in low-fat form. In order for lunch to be better digested, it is better to rest after eating and go outside for a walk. It is advisable to have dinner no later than one and a half to two hours before bedtime; a glass of milk or yogurt is enough at night.

Daily routine for an 11 year old child

The child’s body spends a lot of energy and has no strength left for anything other than studying. It is necessary to properly organize your daily routine and diet so that weakened immunity and deficiency of vitamins and minerals do not provoke disease. At the 12th year of life, the process of fixation of the spine is completed, a constant ratio of bones and cartilaginous tissue is determined. The oral cavity is also transformed - baby teeth are all replaced by molars, and the risk of caries increases. Be sure to teach your teenager to take care of their teeth.

At the age of 11, a teenager spends more time at school or at home alone when his parents are at work, so monitoring his routine during the day is quite problematic. All that remains is to set the child up for proper nutrition, meals at the same time, and be sure to feed him breakfast. Organize meals in the school canteen. Sometimes children, having played outside, skip lunch or dinner and snack on the go - this harms digestion. Try not to allow yourself to sit for a long time at the computer or watch TV at night to avoid fears, anxieties and insomnia.

Activities with a child aged 11 (how to develop)

During adolescence, a child first begins to realize his uniqueness and uniqueness. Gradually growing up, he discovers flexibility of thinking, creativity, and the ability to creatively approach solving many problems. In adult life, skills acquired in early adolescence are used. Under the influence of the school community, abilities for certain types of activities appear that can be developed.

Interests acquire depth and stability - this could be sports training, music, or drawing. Organizational skills and a penchant for learning foreign languages develop. By learning to express his feelings, the younger teenager changes his self-awareness, a desire for self-expression and a positive assessment of his creative success appears. It is important to encourage children's creativity and to always be with them, to approve of their hobbies. To do this, you can allow them to sign up for clubs, individual lessons, and interest groups. It should be noted that the development of intelligence is closely related to creative self-awareness.

Games and toys for children aged 11

Schoolchildren's games differ from plush bunnies and dolls, which are not excluded at all, but become favorite souvenirs. At the age of 11-12, children’s main interest is learning, so they are keenly interested in logic puzzles, riddle games, and board card games that combine exciting leisure time and cognitive activity. Many primary schoolchildren have transferred their interests to the computer, but we should not forget about the health risks of endless sitting in front of a screen. Therefore, buy your children exciting and stylishly designed games that will not only delight children, but also allow them to demonstrate and develop logic, thinking, and attention.

Raising a child at 11 years old

Parents of children of early adolescence should take into account the main characteristics of their child - changes in the nervous system of the body, which entails vulnerability, mental instability, mood swings and behavioral deviations. Indifference to lessons and grades may appear, and relationships with teachers begin to deteriorate. Unwanted acquaintances may appear in the yard and set a bad example, and children blindly follow the rules of their new authorities.

The desire for independence at this age manifests itself more strongly than ever. At the same time, the child is faced with various social roles in society and the team, but he still cannot organize his life without mom and dad. The best thing you can do is to talk with him more often “as equals,” discuss problems, give advice, but make the final choice in the interests of both parties. If he knows that you consider him old enough, allowing him to choose his own time to do homework or help around the house, he will be very pleased. Advise him to choose the things that need to be done first, as well as time for rest.

Try not to overload it and give it time to rest. Contact the class teacher and the school more often - children very much feel the control of their parents, although they try not to show it. Do not scold for shortcomings, but try together to develop a “salvation” plan and follow it. It is very important for a child to maintain and develop faith in their own strengths, the desire to become better, to educate themselves and achieve results. Participation in solving family problems instills responsibility in the child, helps to develop as an individual and gain experience for future family life.

Sex education

At the age of 12, some girls already begin their first menstruation, which indicates the onset of puberty. In boys, sexual characteristics develop a little later, but conversations on these topics need to be held now. Children react to this bashfully, hiding their embarrassment, but the task of adults is to correctly focus attention on details related to health and further sexual development. Girls should be aware that their periods may be irregular for the first few months or even years, and this is considered normal.

You also need to talk to boys about wet dreams so that they are not embarrassed, afraid when they appear, and do not withdraw into themselves. This is the period of early teenage infertility, when the body is just beginning to develop and the ability to fertilize is not yet developed, but children should already know how pregnancy occurs in early adolescence. The explanation should be in a simple accessible form, understandable to children - the embryo located in the mother’s belly receives nutrition from the mother’s blood, and if there is no pregnancy, these substances come out in the form of menstrual flow.

Overweight

Girls starting in their early teens can become overly focused on their appearance, and especially their weight. The mother should play a large role in the formation of an adequate image. You shouldn’t emphasize your desire to lose weight in every possible way, as girls unconsciously copy their mother’s attitude towards their body. You cannot make fun of a child’s appearance, even benignly, otherwise adaptation to physical changes will be more difficult. Adolescence will soon pass, but problems will remain.

Parents who have repeatedly encountered hysterics in their children will probably name the signs of hysteria that their child has. They will also talk about their emotions, which are by no means positive. There is shame, anger, guilt, and where does positivity come from when the “fire siren” suddenly turns on and a heavy artillery of uncontrollable tears comes out. And here neither words, nor persuasion, nor a favorite toy help.

Parents often come to our Center for consultation with the question: “Constant hysterics. What to do?"

Any behavior, both an adult and a child, has its reasons, and until you understand why your child’s tantrums started, it will be difficult to move on.

Let's look at the main reasons for children's tantrums:

1. Physiological. Includes disruption of the child’s nervous system, congenital or newly developed diseases, as well as severe fatigue or an incipient disease. The child’s body sometimes signals its violations in this way.

And if your baby is usually calm and cheerful and suddenly becomes irritated and goes into hysterics for any reason (5-6 times a day), you should contact your pediatrician.

2. Crises of age-related development - at the moments of transitional ages (1,3,7,11 years), when the most severe changes in the psyche and body of the child occur, hysterics may appear.

If your baby is going through one of the crises, the best thing is to be patient and learn to prevent hysteria, and then talk through his emotions with the child, support and offer other methods to cope with obstacles along the way.

3. Intrafamily reason. The most common. After all, children are the fruit of a family in which they grow and develop, and if hysterics appear, most often this is a hidden call for help, a request for attention.

Sometimes the cause of children's tantrums can be disagreements between parents in raising a child (for example, one allows everything, the other prohibits everything, etc.)

* Tanya’s parents (4 years old) came to the reception and sincerely wanted to help their daughter, who cried for any reason if something didn’t work out for her; she quit what she started, got angry, started crying loudly if no one reacted to her, started crying louder, then couldn’t stop until she got tired).

As a result of a conversation with the family, it turned out that Tanya’s dad picks her up after kindergarten, and her mom is at work late. The father tries to instill hard work and responsibility in his daughter, and the mother believes that it is too early to overload a 4-year-old child and tries to pamper her.

Mom and dad have an obvious conflict on this basis.

- As a result, little Tanya does not understand how to behave, because what is allowed with mom is absolutely not allowed with dad. The only thing that works with both parents is hysteria. It has been noticed that when a girl starts crying a lot, both parents calm her down.

Thus, Tanya’s tantrums not only signal to parents that they need to choose one parenting model, but also help to unite them for a short time to calm their daughter together.

In addition, the girl clearly lacked her mother’s attention, and in moments of severe hysteria, her mother came home from work and calmed her down.

If you feel that the problem of a child’s tantrums is internal to the family, you should contact a family psychologist who will help diagnose the causes and find general strategies for raising the child.

4. Psychological trauma or severe stress in the child.

*A mother came to the reception with her boy Vanya (6 years old). Mom was worried that recently her son began to cry every time his mother left him in the garden, and when he got sick and needed injections, he became hysterical and did not allow himself to be given an injection. After the conversation, it turned out that on the eve of the appearance of hysterics, the boy’s beloved cat died, at that time the boy was playing with her knitting needles and, for educational purposes, his grandmother told him that she had swallowed a needle. This turned out to be very stressful for the boy, and he developed a fear of death and aichmophobia (fear of needles and piercing objects).

The boy was given 5 classes to correct fears (in the form of drawing, sand games and games to relieve anxiety). The family was consulted about the rules of communication. As a result of therapy, the boy's hysterics stopped.

So, if sudden strong hysterics occur at the sight of any object or place, it is best to contact a child psychologist to exclude the possibility of psychological trauma and the emergence of fears in the child.

There are general rules of behavior at the time of hysteria:

1. It is best to prevent a hysteria, distract the child, and offer an adequate replacement for the subject of the hysteria.

2. At the moment of the hysteria itself, the child cannot control himself, and if it has already begun, in its full form, and you understand that the child does not see or react to you, the only thing you can do is take him away from the place where it happened happened, protect from life-threatening objects. It’s better in his room or area, for a while, saying that you love him, and he can come to you when he calms down. After all, at this moment the child is especially vulnerable and vulnerable, and in order to calm down, he needs time and needs to know that he is loved.

3. After an attack, you definitely need to hug the child, talk about his emotions, and calm him down.

4. And only after some time talk about the reasons for such a reaction and its harm.

Remember, your child loves you very much and, if he has started to have tantrums, he undoubtedly needs your help, understanding and love.

With wishes of happiness to you and your family.

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Child behavior problems at 11 years old

What to do if an 11-year-old child has aggression

Why does an 11-year-old child become aggressive? This is how his desire for independence manifests itself. He opposes adults, creating a certain psychological barrier around himself in the form of aggression. As a rule, a child’s aggressiveness is not a sign of attack, but of defense. Therefore, parents, first of all, need not to respond to aggression with aggression, but to support their child and always be with him.

A healthy amount of aggressiveness in your child’s character is even beneficial. She will teach him to be proactive and develop leadership qualities in him.

Manifestations of emotional aggressiveness, to some extent, can be called exercises for training the will.

What to do if a child at 11 years old has hysterics

Why does an 11-year-old child constantly cry and have hysterics? Why just recently was he flexible and calm, but now he has become uncontrollable? Tantrums are common in children at this age for several reasons, including:

The desire to assert oneself. If just recently your word was decisive, now the teenager believes that he himself knows perfectly well how to live. As a result, this leads to emotional outbursts.
Manipulation. Even at this age, a child may try to manipulate you with hysterics. During puberty, you want a lot, so children often practice on their parents the strategy they used before: “if I cry and scream, I will get what I want.”
"A message to the world." Perhaps your child is not understood in the group. Hysteria, in this case, is a way to express oneself and show that one is the center of the universe, which, unfortunately, is good for nothing.

What to do? How to calm an 11 year old child? First of all, do not react to his emotional outbursts. All this is temporary, and hysterics will pass with age. If a child is crying, try to hug him, do not soothe him and just let him cry. Well, in especially severe cases, the best way is to leave him alone.

What to do if a child at 11 years old becomes uncontrollable

Disobedience of a child is also one of the ways of self-affirmation. Punishments and control, in this case, will not give the desired effect. What to do if a child at the age of 11 becomes disobedient? It is best to realize that you have lost power over the teenager and rebuild your attitude towards him. Understand that he is growing up, and based on this understanding, try to build a new model of relationship with your child.

Why does an 11 year old child lie?

Children generally tend to lie, and they are stimulated to do so by a whole range of motives. For example, the desire to avoid punishment, protecting friends, fear of humiliation. With the help of lies, children are freed from feelings of fear, and this is quite natural. It is worth sounding the alarm if the child’s fantasies go beyond the boundaries of reason. Sometimes children get confused in their imaginations and find themselves captive, then you cannot do without the help of a psychologist.

What to do if an 11-year-old child is very nervous

Nervous children are a pressing problem for parents. It is characterized by increased excitability, irritability, impressionability, insomnia, and neurosis. Sometimes children are initially born nervous, and sometimes they become so due to adolescence.

A common cause of nervousness is improper upbringing. Therefore, you need to reconsider all the principles that you adhered to in relation to your child.

What to do if an 11-year-old child steals

Theft in children aged 11 is often due to the fact that the child’s volitional sphere is not sufficiently developed. It is difficult for children at this age to cope with temptation, although they are usually always ashamed of their actions. What should parents do? Foster independence in your child, set tasks for him to complete. If theft occurs, do not make the incident public. A child’s psyche may not withstand such a test, so just talk to the child and convince him that this is not possible. If necessary, talk to a child psychologist.

A child of 11 years of age is extremely vulnerable. His psyche is unstable, and his behavior leaves much to be desired. Only parents can help their child resolve the internal conflict and realize himself as an individual. Be prepared for difficulties and be sure to help your child cope with all the problems of puberty.

Doctor Komarovsky about tantrums in a child

Children's tantrums can complicate the life of anyone, even very patient adults. Just yesterday the baby was a “darling”, but today he has been replaced - he screams for any reason, squeals, falls to the floor, bangs his head against the walls and carpet, and no amount of persuasion helps. Such unpleasant scenes are almost never just one-off protests. Often, a child’s tantrums are repeated systematically, sometimes several times a day.

This cannot but worry and puzzle parents who wonder what they did wrong, whether everything is okay with the baby and how to stop these antics. The authoritative, famous children's doctor Evgeniy Komarovsky tells moms and dads how to respond to children's tantrums.

About the problem

Children's tantrums are a ubiquitous phenomenon. And even if the parents of a toddler say that they have the calmest baby in the world, this does not mean that he never makes a scene out of the blue. Until recently, it was somehow embarrassing to admit to hysterics in one’s own child; parents were embarrassed, in case those around them would think that they were raising a toddler poorly, and sometimes they were even afraid that others would consider their beloved child mentally “not like that.” So we fought as best we could, in the family circle.

In recent years, they began to talk about the problem with specialists, child psychologists, psychiatrists, neurologists and pediatricians. And an insight came: there are much more hysterical children than might seem at first glance. According to statistics available to child psychologists in one of the large clinics in Moscow, 80% of children under the age of 6 experience tantrums periodically, and 55% of such children have regular hysterics. On average, children can have such attacks from 1 time a week to 3-5 times a day.

A child's tantrum has certain core symptoms. As a rule, an attack is preceded by some identical events and situations.

During a hysteria, a child may scream heart-rendingly, tremble, choke, and there will not be so many tears. There may be trouble breathing, the heart rate increases, and many children try to harm themselves by scratching their faces, biting their hands, hitting walls or the floor. The attacks in children are quite long, after which they cannot calm down for a long time and sob.

At certain age periods, hysterics acquire stronger manifestations; at such “critical” stages of growing up, emotional outbursts change their color. They may appear unexpectedly, or they may disappear just as suddenly. But hysterics should never be ignored, just as a child should not be allowed to manipulate adult family members by screaming and stamping his feet.

Doctor Komarovsky's opinion

First of all, says Evgeniy Komarovsky, parents should remember that a child in a state of hysterics definitely needs an audience. Kids never make scandals in front of the TV or washing machine; they choose a living person, and among the family members, the one who is most sensitive to his behavior is suitable for the role of spectator.

If dad begins to worry and get nervous, then he will be the one chosen by the child for a spectacular hysteria. And if the mother ignores the child’s behavior, then throwing a tantrum in front of her is simply not interesting.

Dr. Komarovskaya will tell you how to wean your child from hysterics in the next video.

This opinion somewhat contradicts the generally accepted opinion of child psychologists, who claim that a child in a state of hysterics has absolutely no control over himself. Komarovsky is sure that the baby is perfectly aware of the situation and the balance of power, and everything he does at this moment is done completely arbitrarily.

Therefore, the main advice from Komarovsky is not to show in any way that the children’s “concert” is in any way touching parents. No matter how strong the tears, screams and stamping of feet may be.

If a child ever gets his way with a tantrum, he will use this method constantly. Komarovsky warns parents to cajole their child during a tantrum.

To give in means to become a victim of manipulation, which will, to one degree or another, constantly improving, continue for the rest of your life.

It is advisable that all family members adhere to calm tactics of behavior and rejection of hysterics, so that mother’s “no” never turns into father’s “yes” or grandmother’s “maybe.” Then the child will quickly understand that hysteria is not a method at all, and will stop testing the nerves of adults.

If the grandmother begins to show gentleness and pity the child offended by parental refusal, then she risks becoming the only spectator of children's hysterics. The problem, says Komarovsky, is the lack of physical security with such grandmothers. After all, usually a grandson or granddaughter gradually stops obeying them and can get into an unpleasant situation in which they can get injured while walking, get burned by boiling water in the kitchen, stick something into an outlet, etc., because the baby will not react in any way to the grandmother’s calls.

What to do?

If a child is 1-2 years old, he is quite quickly able to form correct behavior at the reflex level. Komarovsky advises putting the baby in a playpen where he will have a safe space. As soon as the hysteria begins, leave the room, but let the child know that he is being heard. As soon as the little one is silent, you can go into his room. If the scream repeats, go out again.

According to Evgeniy Olegovich, two days are enough for a one and a half to two year old child to develop a stable reflex - “mom is nearby if I don’t yell.”

For such “training,” parents will truly need nerves of iron, the doctor emphasizes. However, their efforts will certainly be rewarded by the fact that in a short time an adequate, calm and obedient child will grow up in their family. And one more important point - the sooner parents apply this knowledge in practice, the better it will be for everyone. If the child is already over 3 years old, this method alone cannot be used. More painstaking work on errors will be required. First of all, over parental mistakes in raising their own child.

The child does not obey and is hysterical

Absolutely any children can be naughty, says Komarovsky. Much depends on the character, temperament, upbringing, norms of behavior that are accepted in the family, on the relationships between the members of this family.

Do not forget about the “transitional” age - 3 years, 6-7 years, adolescence.

3 years

At the age of about three years, a child begins to understand and become aware of himself in this big world, and, naturally, he wants to test this world for strength. In addition, children at this age are not yet and are not always able to express in words their feelings, emotions and experiences on any occasion. So they show them in the form of hysterics.

Quite often at this age stage, night tantrums begin. They are spontaneous in nature, the child simply wakes up at night and immediately practices a piercing cry, arches, sometimes tries to break free from adults and try to run away. Typically, nighttime tantrums do not last so long, and the child “outgrows” them; they stop as suddenly as they began.

6-7 years

At 6-7 years old, a new stage of growing up occurs. The baby is already ripe to go to school, and they are beginning to demand more from him than before. He is very afraid of not meeting these requirements, he is afraid of “letting him down,” the stress accumulates and sometimes spills out again in the form of hysteria.

Evgeny Komarovsky emphasizes that most often parents turn to doctors with this problem when the child is already 4-5 years old, when hysterics occur “out of habit.”

If at an earlier age the parents failed to stop this behavior and unwittingly became participants in a harsh performance that the child plays out in front of them every day, trying to achieve something of his own.

Parents are usually frightened by some external manifestations of hysteria, such as a semi-fainting state of the child, convulsions, “hysterical bridge” (arching the back), deep sobs and breathing problems. Affective-respiratory disorders, as Evgeniy Olegovich calls this phenomenon, are characteristic mainly of young children - up to 3 years old. With strong crying, the child exhales almost the entire volume of air from the lungs, and this leads to paleness and breath holding.

Such attacks are typical for capricious and excitable children, says Komarovsky. Many children use other methods of venting anger, disappointment or resentment - they sublimate the emotion into movement - falling, knocking their feet and hands, hitting their heads against objects, walls, the floor.

With a prolonged and severe hysterical affective-respiratory attack, involuntary convulsions may begin if the child’s consciousness begins to suffer. Sometimes in this state the baby can wet himself, even if he has been going potty perfectly for a long time, and no incidents happen. Usually, after convulsions (tonic - with muscle tension or clonic - with relaxation, “limping”), breathing is restored, the skin ceases to be “blue,” and the baby begins to calm down.

With such manifestations of hysteria, it is still better to consult a pediatric neurologist, since the same symptoms are characteristic of some nervous disorders.

Teach your child to express emotions in words. Your child cannot avoid being angry or irritated at all, like any other normal person. You just need to teach him how to correctly express his anger or irritation.
A child prone to hysterical attacks should not be overly patronized, coddled and cherished; it is best to send him to kindergarten as early as possible. There, Komarovsky says, attacks usually do not occur at all due to the absence of constant and impressionable spectators of hysterics - mom and dad.
Hysterical attacks can be learned to anticipate and control. To do this, parents need to carefully observe when the hysteria usually begins. The child may be sleep-deprived, hungry, or he cannot stand being rushed. Try to avoid potential “conflict” situations.
At the first sign of a hysteria beginning, you need to try to distract the child. Usually, Komarovsky says, this “works” quite successfully with children under three years of age. With older guys it will be more difficult.
If your child tends to hold his breath during a tantrum, there is nothing particularly wrong with that. Komarovsky says that in order to improve breathing, you just need to blow in the baby’s face, and he will definitely take a reflexive breath.
No matter how difficult it may be for parents to deal with their child’s tantrums, Komarovsky strongly recommends going all the way. If you let your child defeat you with a tantrum, it will be even more difficult later. After all, from a hysterical three-year-old one day, a hysterical and completely obnoxious teenager of 15-16 years old will grow up. It will ruin the lives of not only the parents. He will make it very difficult for himself.

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My 9 year old son throws tantrums and sometimes it’s scary.

My 9 year old son throws tantrums and sometimes it’s scary. Maybe someone has had this, tell me. It's very difficult for me. I love him very much, but when he becomes insane, to be honest, I get scared, he calls me names, fights, he just goes into hysterics. I already thought about calling an ambulance a couple of times, but I was afraid, because it’s stressful for everyone, then he lets it go and asks for forgiveness. I love him very much and try to pay more attention to him. At school he went horribly wrong and began to study poorly, but in general he is a quiet and modest boy. She took him to a psychologist and she said that everything is fine with him, he is in early adolescence and he cannot cope with the hormones that are playing in him now. she says that he loves and respects me very much, I come first in his family. but what should I do? Will it outgrow it? Has anyone encountered this?

It’s a bit early for hormones at 9 years old, especially in a boy.

Doctors say that now the children are early, so it is difficult for him to cope with early maturation.

Elena, I can tell you without doctors, my daughter is a teenager, my children are early, but not that young... you wouldn’t need to see a psychologist, but an experienced neurologist..

They said the same thing and prescribed vitamins to take. he wants a lot of attention.

So I don’t understand why he’s hysterical?

he just walks around normally all day out of nowhere, then like a bundle of energy from him to me or my father, then he lets me go.

does it attract attention?

yes, I’m going through all this in real life now, only with a girl, I’ve already read a lot of literature, but I can tell from my daughter’s classmates that boys are just starting to enter adolescence little by little in their later years, I still think this is not adolescence for you, but ordinary childhood jealousy, Apparently, he receives little attention, so he does everything to attract it to himself, albeit in a negative way.

He has a big workload, he goes to dances, I was already thinking about karate and he wanted to, but he won’t leave the dances, he likes it there, and on the rest of the days he has a math tutor. There are plenty of lessons without even looking at the top.

weigh it down and it will be silk!

it doesn't help, he'll stand on his hind legs with just one slap

I can’t imagine, it’s enough for me to just raise my voice that everything was as it should be!

Can he be occupied with something like sports or clubs?

goes to dances. The education system is amazing. At one time I went to a bunch of clubs, but now there are a lot of lessons, and even tutors.

It’s also true that the workload is terrible! Could he also be jealous of his youngest?

no, he adores the younger ones more, on the contrary, jealousy, he even changes her diapers and she loves him and laughs with him. The younger one also runs after him and they are friendly.

It seems to me that dad (uncle, grandfather, man in general) should talk to the boy about the behavior of a man in the family, with his mother and in life

good belt for my son

is it also beating? and the same hysterics?

but from me he says differently if you buy it, you have to, he denies everything.

For boys, adolescence lasts four or even five years and is much more active.

Psychology and medicine recognize adolescence as a rather difficult stage in the process of a child growing up. Moreover, no matter how long the transitional age lasts, it can be conditionally divided into three phases.

The first phase is the period of preparation of the body and psyche for the upcoming serious changes. The second phase is the actual transitional age in children. It is also called puberty. The third phase is post-transitional (or post-pubertal) age, during which the completion of physiological and psychological formation occurs. The first phase of adolescence in children can be conditionally equated to early adolescence, but post-adolescence can be attributed to the time of adolescence. The time when adolescence ends is characterized by growing interest in the opposite sex, emerging and growing sexual activity.

yes, I’m in a panic, and I also want to cry at school because of his performance. He only gets two grades and doesn’t understand that he needs to study, I still hope that next year it will be better.

so we, too, have been arguing with ours since the first grade, she didn’t like him, she gets 12 from tutors, when the substitute teacher comes too, but ours only gives two marks, other bags are carried and handed to her and they advise me, but I don’t do it on principle . So he came down and even sat him on the last desk alone.

I have to try, because sometimes I don’t want to live when I see him in this state.

and you think where do husbands come from beating and calling their wives... he’s already growing up. If you don't do it soon... you'll be late.

For boys, adolescence lasts four or even five years and is much more active.

Psychology and medicine recognize adolescence as a rather difficult stage in the process of a child growing up. Moreover, no matter how long the transitional age lasts, it can be conditionally divided into three phases.

But not only changes in the child’s appearance indicate that adolescence has arrived. There are symptoms of another kind - the child’s behavior and even his character changes. Just yesterday, an affectionate and obedient child suddenly becomes suspicious, touchy, rude, and categorical. He gets into the habit of arguing with you about everything.

Emotional instability and maximalism, stubbornness and rudeness, often turning into rudeness - this is also an age-related feature that is caused by hormonal storms in the body of a teenager. Adolescence brings changes in everything, including the health status of the teenager. And psychological problems cannot but put additional strain on the child’s physical condition. The main difficulties of adolescence lie precisely in this interweaving of physiological and psychological problems, which come as a complete surprise to the teenager himself. As he embarks on the path of growing up, he has no idea what challenges await him ahead! And very often the teenager’s body begins to malfunction.

Diseases of adolescence can be temporary. Most often, ailments are caused by the fact that some organs and systems do not have time to grow as quickly as the teenager himself grows, and therefore do not fully cope with their functions. Subsequently, they “catch up” with their owner’s growth, and the teenager’s condition returns to normal. The most common diseases of adolescence are acne, vegetative-vascular dystonia and teenage depression.

Vegetative-vascular dystonia is a disorder in the functioning of the autonomic nervous system, which is a regulator of internal balance in the body. Such disorders arise due to hormonal processes occurring in the body, as well as due to psycho-emotional overload to which adolescents are exposed. Symptoms of this disease are rapid heartbeat, dizziness, sweating, low blood pressure, chilliness, abdominal pain of unknown origin, increased fatigue, and irritability. As a rule, all these phenomena disappear when adolescence passes.

Trying to understand the contradictions of adult life and his internal positions, a teenager becomes withdrawn, stubborn, shy or, conversely, aggressive and completely uncontrollable.

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It is believed that an 11-year-old child has already entered early puberty. At this time, changes begin in his mental and physical state. Gradually, the child turns from a toddler into a teenager. A number of changes occur that affect the processes of thinking and communication. It is important for parents to take these features into account and be prepared for them.

Psychology of a child 11 years old

Let's consider the main changes that parents should focus on and coordinate tactics of behavior and communication with the child:

Physiological changes.
The first signs of puberty appear earlier in girls than in boys. That's why girls feel like they've grown up earlier. Parents, especially mothers, need to be ready to give advice and support the girl during a period of dramatic changes. The task of loved ones is to explain how to cope with new experiences and events.

Suspension.
The psychology of an 11-year-old child is determined by the desire to distance himself from the family. Children listen more to the opinions of their peers, they have new authorities. This hurts parents; they are not always able to accept the fact that their son or daughter’s friends know more about them than mom and dad. At this moment, it is important not to sort out the relationship with the child, from which he will distance himself even more, but to help him properly establish himself in society.

Self-affirmation among peers.
Starting from the age of 10-11, the role of peers and friends in a child’s life becomes more significant. Secrets, common affairs and topics for heart-to-heart conversations appear. However, sometimes the child’s close environment does not suit the parents, which also leads to conflicts and greater separation of children from their parents. It is important to follow the rule: do not prohibit, but guide. You should reasonably point out the negative aspects of the behavior of someone you don’t like so much and from whose influence you want to protect your child. Give examples from life, give the teenager the opportunity to analyze and draw conclusions himself. Of course, this will not happen immediately, but the child will eventually make the right decision.

The struggle for a place in society.
Raising 11-year-old children is a difficult process. To help a child assert himself among his peers, it is necessary to show by example how to behave and make decisions correctly. Another thing you should pay attention to is the formation of self-esteem in the child. In this case, parents can help the child by stimulating him. Celebrate his strengths, teach him to approach his shortcomings with humor. Help to follow fashion and technological progress. Encourage his successes and aspirations.

Interest in the opposite sex increases.
Against the background of hormonal changes, boys and girls become increasingly interested in the opposite sex. You should not be afraid of this, but you should not miss the moment and prepare your child for proper communication with the opposite sex.
In order to comply with all the above rules and establish a trusting relationship with your child, it is important to be both a parent and a friend to the child. Then your grown-up baby will certainly follow your advice and take into account your opinion.

Think about what your eleven year old has been eating in the last few days! Did he have fresh fruits and vegetables on his daily menu? How much and what kind of liquid does your child drink during the day?

Usually, parents carefully consider the child’s diet in the first years of his life. Further, with the transition to a common table, the child often eats those dishes that all other family members eat. In kindergarten, as a rule, a menu for the week is drawn up and approved.

Meals in preschool institutions are considered balanced, dietary, and also meet all required standards. At school and after school, control over the nutrition of students is gradually lost. In pursuit of the mental and physical development of their children, parents fill their schoolchildren’s free time with all kinds of sports clubs, creative clubs and classes with tutors. Often in this cycle of events there is no time for a proper lunch and rest. And adults remember their child’s diet when he or she develops health problems.

Don't forget that at the age of 11 children grow very rapidly. Girls develop secondary ones. For boys, it starts a little later, but they spend no less energy for development and growth.

During this period, it is very important to pay attention to the child’s nutrition. After all, a lack of vitamins and microelements can lead to the following disorders: blurred vision, weakened immunity, nervous system disorders, inflammatory processes of the skin and mucous membranes, as well as diseases of the teeth and gums.

First, analyze your diet and your taste preferences. Perhaps it is your fault that your child does not eat certain foods, drinks sweet carbonated drinks and fast food. Therefore, changing the diet of the entire family now can become an indispensable contribution to the health of not only current, but also future generations.

So, a child aged 11 years should receive the following products daily:

Milk and dairy products. It is important to note that this should not include products with a long shelf life, as well as those containing flavorings and dyes. The approximate amount of cottage cheese consumed is 100 g, milk and fermented milk products - up to 0.5 liters, hard cheese - 10 g
Fresh fruits, berries and vegetables. The main thing is that these products correspond to the season and the area in which you live
Unrefined vegetable oils (sunflower, olive or flaxseed) – 1-2 tbsp. l
Various cereals
Lean meats

Along with these foods, the child should receive fish, preferably sea fish, as well as legumes, nuts and greens, 1-2 times a week. But it is better to reduce the pasta that all children love a little and give preference to products made from durum wheat.

Drinking regime is an integral part of a healthy lifestyle for any person. Experts say school-age children need to drink about 1.5 liters of water per day.

At the same time, it is considered a bad habit to wash down food with water. Everyone knows that water dilutes gastric juice and, accordingly, it becomes harder for the stomach to digest food.

You need to drink either 30 minutes before eating or an hour after it. It is advisable to exclude sweet carbonated drinks and store-bought juices. An alternative can be compotes, fruit drinks, herbal teas and regular drinking water. Gastroenterologists say that drinking freshly squeezed juices should be moderate and infrequent, since the acids contained in these drinks adversely affect the gastric mucosa. In any case, such juices must be diluted with water.

The diet of an eleven-year-old child should not differ significantly from that of a two-year-old child. This means that food intake is carried out every 4 – 4.5 hours. Under no circumstances should you skip breakfast. Many parents claim that their children cannot eat in the morning and have a good breakfast at school. That is, for the first two lessons the child remains hungry, and accordingly thinks worse and is nervous about this. Eat breakfast yourself and teach your children to do the same.

For the first meal, boiled eggs or an omelet with herbs, cottage cheese with fruit or porridge are suitable.

For second breakfast, you can give the student any fruit. Lessons usually end around 14.00 and at this time it is very important for children to get a full lunch, which will ideally consist of 3 courses. If you cannot go home to have lunch between school and extracurricular activities, you can do this in the school canteen or take food in a special thermos or container.

In children aged 11 years, parents still remain the authority and therefore it is during this period need to talk more often about the benefits of healthy eating, about the consequences of eating harmful foods such as chips, crackers, salted nuts and other various snacks.

There are many documentaries and TV shows about diet-related diseases. As a rule, viewing such materials together produces a beneficial effect. It is considered a bad habit to eat while watching TV, reading a book or sitting at the computer. At this time, a person is not focused on the process of eating, does not chew food thoroughly and does not feel full. The result of all this is excess weight and related disorders.

Of course, the problem of changing the diet of an 11-year-old child is difficult to solve when parents are at work from morning to evening, and there are no grandparents nearby. Checking by phone does not give anything and the child continues to eat dry food all day long. In this case, it is necessary, together with the student, to create a menu for the week, taking into account his taste preferences and the above-mentioned nutritional rules, and observance of this diet must be encouraged by a joint walk in the park, at the skating rink or to the cinema.

Approximate child's menu

Breakfast: any milk porridge/cottage cheese with fruits or dried fruits/omelet with herbs
Second breakfast: fruit/cottage cheese
Lunch: soup/borscht, salad/porridge/pasta, cutlet/fish, jelly/compote
Afternoon snack: fruits/vegetables/cottage cheese/casserole
Dinner: porridge/kefir/milk/fish with vegetables.